Around the Office: Hats

I really like hats. I don’t really wear hats that often, but I like having them around. There are certain situations where you need a special kind of hat, and it is a great joy to be able to put that needed hat on.

I have a lot of shelves in my office, and I had a great brainstorm one day and put all my collected haberdashery around the top level. I have more at home, but these are my display hats, and their stories, left to right from my computer chair.

A bear hat that I got from my sister. This is probably my current favorite. It comes in handy for Baylor parades and sporting events.


A Hawaii ball cap I got from my in-laws from their Hawaii trip.

A Home Depot hat (the kind with the giant top part that farmers and elderly men wear) that Scott Eberle gave me from his time at said depot.

A sombrero I won at Six Flags in high school for “fooling the guesser” (he overestimated my weight – my scrawniness paid off for once!).

A straw hat from Tractor Supply Company that Scott Eberle gave me from his time at said company (he currently works for the Austin Fire Department – maybe I’ll get a fireman’s hat from said department!).

This awesome hat I bought for $5 at Wal-Mart. With my aviator sunglasses on, I put this on and transform into Earl the trucker.

A Farmersville Farmers hat I got from Aaron Glenn.

The excellent cowboy hat pictured at the top that I got from Wal-Mart, and lasted through four summers of summer camp. It’s my swimming hat.

This sweet homemade hat featuring a manatee.

My sweet wife, who was my sweet girlfriend at the time, hand-stitched this on to the back:

What a woman.

And finally, the triumvirate of the better cowboy hats and the Australian walk-about hat.


In the office, they serve as decoration, and a visual symbol of all the metaphorical hats a minister must wear.

There are also hats I mourn. I had a Snoopy “WWI Flying Ace” hat that I still miss, and I donated my barbarian helmet my dad made from a mixing bowl and two scraps of wood to summer camp. And one hat that bit the dust last year will certainly get its own entry, as it involves Greek class and the book of Revelation.

I was thinking the other day about hats and remembered, as if from a dream, the cartoon linked to below. I think it must have affected me on a deep level as a very young child, because I still feel this thrill of adopting a whole new persona when I put on a special hat.

(Make sure and appreciate some of the things that were deemed appropriate for children in 1956 when this cartoon was made, such as Elmer’s threat to see Bugs’ spurting blood, the questionable portrayal of Native Americans, and smoking!)

Bugs' Bonnets

Happy St. Patrick's Day/ St. Patrick's Breastplate

I hope you’re having a great day! If you want to know more about St. Patrick and the impact of his life, I highly recommend Thomas Cahill’s “How the Irish Saved Civilization.” In a thoroughly entertaining and readable way he makes the case that as Roman Empire and its lifeless state-sponsored Christianity crumbled, Irish Christianity thrived. Eventually, it would be Irish Christians who founded the monasteries in Europe that copied Scripture, preserved many ancient writings, and brought vitality back to Christian faith. And the man responsible for Irish Christianity? St. Patrick.

Yesterday I mentioned St. Patrick’s Breastplate, an ancient Irish prayer attributed to the patron saint. Scholars think the oldest surviving copy may actually date about two centuries after Patrick’s death, but there is no reason to believe it couldn’t have originated with him.

Why “Breastplate?” The prayer is also called St. Patrick’s Lorica, the Latin word for body armor. Roman soldiers wore several varieties of lorica, but in monastic circles, a lorica was a prayer or incantation that was intended to protect the body from harm. Later Christian knights sometimes literally inscribed such prayers on armor or shields. The practice takes its inspiration from Ephesians 6:10-17, “put on the full armor of God.”

Patrick’s lorica is certainly a prayer for protection, as well as much more. It is a powerful statement of theology, a vision for ministry, and an especially Irish take on the omnipresence of God. In 1889 Frances Alexander adapted it into a hymn, and it is this version that is framed in my office.
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I bind unto myself today the strong Name of the Trinity,
By invocation of the same the Three in One and One in Three.

I bind this today to me forever by power of faith, Christ’s incarnation;
His baptism in Jordan river, His death on Cross for my salvation;
His bursting from the spicèd tomb, His riding up the heavenly way,
His coming at the day of doom I bind unto myself today.

I bind unto myself the power of the great love of cherubim;
The sweet ‘Well done’ in judgment hour, the service of the seraphim,
Confessors’ faith, Apostles’ word, the Patriarchs’ prayers, the prophets’ scrolls,
All good deeds done unto the Lord and purity of virgin souls.

I bind unto myself today the virtues of the star lit heaven,
The glorious sun’s life giving ray, the whiteness of the moon at even,
The flashing of the lightning free, the whirling wind’s tempestuous shocks,
The stable earth, the deep salt sea around the old eternal rocks.

I bind unto myself today the power of God to hold and lead,
His eye to watch, His might to stay, His ear to hearken to my need.
The wisdom of my God to teach, His hand to guide, His shield to ward;
The word of God to give me speech, His heavenly host to be my guard.

Against the demon snares of sin, the vice that gives temptation force,
The natural lusts that war within, the hostile men that mar my course;
Or few or many, far or nigh, in every place and in all hours,
Against their fierce hostility I bind to me these holy powers.

Against all Satan’s spells and wiles, against false words of heresy,
Against the knowledge that defiles, against the heart’s idolatry,
Against the wizard’s evil craft, against the death wound and the burning,
The choking wave, the poisoned shaft, protect me, Christ, till Thy returning.

Christ be with me, Christ within me, Christ behind me, Christ before me,
Christ beside me, Christ to win me, Christ to comfort and restore me.
Christ beneath me, Christ above me, Christ in quiet, Christ in danger,
Christ in hearts of all that love me, Christ in mouth of friend and stranger.

I bind unto myself the Name, the strong Name of the Trinity,
By invocation of the same, the Three in One and One in Three.
By Whom all nature hath creation, Eternal Father, Spirit, Word:
Praise to the Lord of my salvation, Salvation is of Christ the Lord.
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I love the idea of taking on the virtues of the natural world. I love the line “the whirling winds tempestuous shocks/ the stable earth, the deep salt sea/ around the old eternal rocks.” I love that the things that are prayed against – spells of wizards and witches, the prospect of being drowned, burned, poisoned, or cut down with a sword, were distinct possibilities at the time and place of Patrick’s ministry. And I love the next to last stanza, “Christ be with me,” etc. It makes the hairs on my arm stand up every time.

Around the Office: Two Good Things in One

Everyone likes to have things around them at work that fill them with a sense of happiness or well-being. Whether you work at home, an office, a cubicle, the driver’s seat of your vehicle, or a off-shore oil rig, chances are you have stuff in your work space that makes you happy.

Here’s one of mine:


That’s right. It’s a combination of two of my favorite things: puppets and John the Baptist. Look at him. Doesn’t he make you just want to repent and be baptized? I made John here several years ago during an “art therapy” session with a college student. I am especially proud of his tissue paper dreadlocks.

Here’s a close-up of his hands:


Looks like John is about to do lunch! Mmmmm. Locusts and wild honey! Nutritious and delicious. J.the B. is also sporting his 100% camel-hair tunic. All the rage among desert-dwelling prophets. Wrinkle-free!